Ready, set, go

Poised. What does it mean to be poised? To "be or cause to be balanced or suspended," "to be ready to do something".

It was critical, each morning before I began to draw, and later write, that I was poised. The alarm went off at 6 and I had till 9 or 10 before our toddler woke up. Nothing like the inevitable abrupt end to the quiet and creative window to get me up and moving. Plus, mornings are my favorite part of the day. They always have been. It feels precious and fleeting, a time of great gratitude.

Ready: organizational harmony

Writing this book required a particular atmosphere in our home. I don't mean silence. It required a rather elaborate harmony on many levels. During the main creation of the book, over the course of about six months, Ezra and I maintained a high level of precision and balance in our lives in general.

To each day of the week, every week on the same day, we assigned a different category to address. One day was for household harmony, and we did extra cleaning so the space was beautiful. One day was for harmony in our communications and we would review and respond to any hanging emails. Another was for meditation, prayer, and talking together about the goals of our souls. There were seven categories and seven days and it worked beautifully.

It was an orderly and inspired time. Clarity seemed accessible every day, with a little bit of effort. And I fed off of it.

Set: relational harmony

Within this organizational harmony, we also had to have relational harmony. If there was any friction or miscommunication between me and Ezra, then my inspiration ceased. I would sit and stare blankly at the page with literally no thoughts. Sometimes I knew there was something off, if I was beginning to doggedly write as though it were a task more important than something the other person was doing. Other times it was more subtle and I just knew I wouldn't be able to write.

Whenever this happened, I could just seek out Ezra (husband) or Ronen (then 3yo son) and love them. Usually this looked like me sitting down and asking about their days, asking what was on their minds. Sometimes, it was 5 minutes of sharing that was needed, other times, 35 minutes. With Ezra, it was generally talking, with Ronen, sometimes talking, sometimes playing together with toys on the floor. But as soon as we were reconnected and there was emotional space for all of us in the house, then I could return to my project and all the ideas would flow easily!

Go: internal harmony

The is the room where I wrote most of the book. It was often early in the morning and lovely like this. Precious, poised and waiting for me.

Often, I liked to wear headphones. They softened the doubts inherent with producing something creative, and focused my intentions, usually onto memories. Each sequence in the book is a melding of maybe three or four distinct memories when the Art of Loving was lived well, either by me as an actor, or as a witness to others living it well.

Then I would uncap my Sharpie, visualize the scene, wait for the precise moment of intense inertia, and GO.